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So I come out of a wee paper shop on Albert St...
Ned: Hirr met! (translation: Here mate!) (double-translation: excuse me, could you please direct your attention towards me for a moment please friend?)
Me: *raises an eyebrow*
Ned: Wanny goaty d'shop fur is? (translation: want to go to the shop for us?) (double-translation: would you please buy me some cigarettes?)
Me: I've just been to the shop.
Ned: Naw bit fir us likes! (translation: No, but, for myself... rather!) (double-translation: You're insulting my intelligence and I can't even tell!!)
Me: Why don't you go to the shop yourself?
Ned: Cuzzaboi winnae sell is fag-zwilly? (Translation: 'Cause the boy will not sell us cigarettes will he?) (double-translation: Are we speaking the same language?! *sigh*)
Me: Well I'm not getting you any. *turns around and begins walking*
Ned: How no ya prick?! (translation: haha! he is walking away - I can insult him now!)
Me: *turns round sporting best pissed off look* WHAT?!
Ned: Nothin' (translation: Oh no - he called my bluff!) (double-translation: I appear to have shit myself... how embarrassing.)
Dundee... ya gotta love it.
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