5 a side

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Despite a brilliant performance from the battling ill funk team, meroca!ne somehow snatched a win on Thursday night.

The contribution of Gav Barton in goal cannot be overstated, with some heroic saves which denied the superior ill funk squad the points.

Berti Vogts was spotted in the crowd at the legendary Drummoig centre and was said to be watching the ill funk forward Burton, with interest.

The fans reacted unfavourably to some showboating by the overconfident Dug Paton last week, and it will be interesting to see if his antics will result in a position on the bench next week.

[kj]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Originally posted by illfunk:
<strong>Despite a brilliant performance from the battling ill funk team, meroca!ne somehow snatched a win on Thursday night.

The contribution of Gav Barton in goal cannot be overstated, with some heroic saves which denied the superior ill funk squad the points.

Berti Vogts was spotted in the crowd at the legendary Drummoig centre and was said to be watching the ill funk forward Burton, with interest.

The fans reacted unfavourably to some showboating by the overconfident Dug Paton last week, and it will be interesting to see if his antics will result in a position on the bench next week.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Merocaine? Winning at 5-a-side? no way. lol. you guys must be really bad. i reccon i could get a team together that could give both of you a run for yer money.

i can smell victory. gav burton has gone home in a ambulance.

I might well have broken my ankle, but I will still be operating in a managerial capacity. Don't get over confident boys. Give me a few weeks, and I'll be kicking asses again. Simmie should be disciplined for his outrageously dirty display on Thursday. Disgusting challenges right left and centre. LEGS ARE BROKEN THAT WAY!!

traces of nandrolone found in merocaine keepers lucozade!
illfunk call for world wide ban.

Illfunk unable to field a full team.
Debts spirling out of control.
Interim administrators to come in and take over!!

20-7!!!!! The biggest reaming in 5-a-side history was dished out on Thursday. We even had Dug playing for the full 60mins and you still got gubbed. Following a protest after the match, the illfunk fans were crying out for investment in new talent. Yet another poor display by Burton has fans shouting for his head, and leaving them bewildered as to why Pogarzelic keeps faith in him. Simmie was dirty as ever.

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Burton's recent poor performance has been put down to a crisis in his personal life which he would like to assure fans, has now been resolved. The managers faith in Burton has been recognised by the player, and he promises to improve performance and simply score more goals.

Eyebrows were however raised by FIFA officials at last weeks match at the injured Gav Burton's continual straying outwith his technical area and interfering with the play.

Top whistler Willie Young saw nothing wrong with Simpson's play and at the end of the day, what the man in black says goes.

The Merocaine camp should know better than to hit out at a referee post match and will now face the rap of the SFA.

The return of "young Mike" to the squad has been a great boost to the ill funk team, and they look forward to dishing out a lesson in 5-a-side.

[LimpKnot]

i think there should be a five a side competition between bands and web sites in the area. That would totally rock.

Like each band get 5 players and have a whole day. It could be a charity event or something.

Yeah. I'm working on organising it. It's gonna be quite expensive that's the only thing.

[kj]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Originally posted by &lt;Gav&gt;:
<strong>Yeah. I'm working on organising it. It's gonna be quite expensive that's the only thing.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">if you held it at Uni it wouldnt be that expensive. We would just have to book the hall for however long you would want to and then pay student prices, as long as everyone has some sort of student card, i think that is how it works. Otherwise, some other method of funding would need to be found.

[Baz]

some other method of funding eh? thinking of selling your ass? better start now, we may have enough money before the world cup in 2006. i would just like to say that the commentary of events placed above was highly entertaining. reaming,lol

Last weeks fixture was postponed due to Merocaine and Illfunk's international commitments over in South Korea. This weeks fixture is being tipped as a potential classic with the return of Gavin Burton to the Merocaine squad. 4 weeks out to due an ankle injury sustained in training has kept the Mero starlet out, however he is now back in training, and is ready to play. Player manager Burton was keeping his cards close to his chest as ever when asked about team selection. "Paton will be given a late fitness check on the aggravated wrist, but other than that, we will just have to see who starts." Across the road in the Illfunk camp, George Burton looked distinctly nervous and downhearted. "We are struggling with players just now. Morale is at a low in the camp. A team building exercise at Drouthy Neebors was hoped to get confidence up, but we ended up arguing." The match is as ever a sell-out, and the match referee is Kenny Clark. - Chic Young - BBC Sports Reporter

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The tension mounts for todays fixture which may well be Kenny G's testimonial. After a shock bid from Arsenal, Kenny will be moving in a matter of weeks to the big smoke.A welcome return to the squad for "Young Mike" has boosted morale.

The final squad is below

Burton,Pogorzelec,McGowan,Young Mike,Simmy,Gray

The ill funk squad are more than aware of Merocaine's Burtons recent injury, and know that he won't be at 100%.

Stress is evident in the merocaine camp also, as the "Continual Education" program run by the club means they all have exams at this time.

John Motson
BBC Sport

breaking news that 2 illfunk players failed a postmatch drug test after thursdays closely faught encounter. suspected to be industrius midfielder mcgowan and prolific striker burton after they were caught on the town in soho along with dwight yorke and russell latapy. burtons agent claimed they were in london searching for a replacement for highbury bound kenny g, while mcgowans agent fredirico balgavies put mcgowans poor performance down to a recurring back injury.
kirsty gallacher
sky sports news